Nicoles reflections after 2. therapy session

A metaphor is a good way to get an understanding of a problem. Here: Beating a Dead Horse as a metphor for how a lot of people try to push their body to far

Beating a dead horse
or taiming a petrified mare

One week after second session with Lilian and the Hope Shortcut

“Haven’t I tried everything?”

The computer screen before me contains two rectangular boxes, side by side. One containing the smiling face of Lilian Sjoberg against a dramatic mountain background and the other containing my image, just a blank white wall behind me. There is something about this new virtual environment where I get to observe myself from this vantage point. I get to look into my own eyes and see the expressions on my face. It is very revealing. I am slightly slumped in my chair. My eyes are squinted into slits with my smile. The thought “Here we go again” crosses my mind. I feel a fool. Haven’t I tried this already? Haven’t I tried everything? I have tried so many things, so many therapies, programs, practitioners, doctors. Honestly, I have had enough. I feel like I am kicking a dead horse. But, I know that Lilian is onto something. She has observed the patterns and made the connections. Lilian is sure, determined, generous and for some reason she is steadfast in encouraging me. Some part of me must have hope, because here I am.

Lilian is appalled at my use of the phrase “beating a dead horse” which I try to explain is just an English turn of phrase.  It is actually quite a gruesome image. She suggests a more hopeful way of looking at things. Yes, the horse has been abused, but we can rehabilitate it. Like Black Beauty, it can trust and be free again. Belief, hope and a positive image is so important for healing. I can’t make much progress if I see my efforts to heal as beating a dead horse.

The dead horse is actually me: my poor abused body that I have been dragging around for years, decades actually, pushing it and forcing it against its will, ignoring it, applying all sorts of remedies, treatments and therapies trying to fix it, and medicating it. The horse understandably, doesn’t want to get up.

Traumatic events are stored in the body

The surviver is the person that react with fear and run away or use the freeze instinct often.

The relaxed person get eaten very fast by the saber tooth tiger.

In modern world the brain is operating in the dark and still collecting information on when to react to survive the next attack from a predator.

If you want to get better accept this biological fact and learn how to get out of your instinct stress

I have felt shifts and changes since I last worked with Lilian over a year ago. My physical condition has deteriorated but I have become so much more aware of the emotional connections to my physical symptoms. My medication is not working as well and my “off” periods have worsened significantly. An “off” is when the medication wears off, or fails and the symptoms of Parkinson’s disease break through. With my symptoms more prominent, I can actually feel what is going on in my body. The symptoms of Parkinson’s disease, when in full force so clearly feel like a full-body panic attack.  Well actually for me, it is mostly the left side of my body that feels the attack. My body is in fear for its life. It tries to stop me by freezing my muscles, stiff so I can’t move forward. My stomach tightens into knots, my throat closes, my eye gets wide dart from side to side. My jaw clenches, my body heats up, and my limbs begin to tremble. It is so clearly a deep terror, panic, all-encompassing fear, like the climax of a horror film when the victim lets out the blood-curdling scream. 

It has also become so 100% clear to me that often my physical symptoms are worsened, or are preceded by a fearful thought or an emotional response, even something seemingly benign, like my son making a mess in the kitchen, my inner critic judging me, or a perceived slight from my husband.  I have also talked to other people living with PD and some of them have confirmed their own experience that emotional upset can trigger an “off”. This not to say that I can control my symptoms, they still come and go on their own schedule holding me hostage for longer periods of time and leaving me with smaller and smaller windows of respite.

Interoception - the forgotten sense

Your skill to interpret what is going on in your body is together with balance and coordination very important skills.

We do not learn about them in school. But the ones that instictivly can feel and use their sence interoception are the ones that fast can do something fast and stop the decline in health.

The ones that understand the language of the body can avoid longterm stress and longlasting  stress symptoms

It is actually hard to really admit this observation. I feel so weak and frail. Is my constitution so fragile that the smallest upset can throw me into a frenzy of whole-body fear? Surely it is not that simple. There are layers of genetic and environmental factors that led to the damage in my brain that causes this intense reaction.  Lilian assures me that it is actually evolutionarily appropriate that survival of the fittest would have favored a heightened fear response. So, in fact, I am an evolutionary survivor. She assures me that this is not my fault.

It is difficult to accept the responsibility that my habitual thoughts, emotions and beliefs may be contributing to my illness that has kept me disabled for so many years. But this is an important starting point- to recognize that physical disease symptoms are linked to thoughts, beliefs and emotions.

This creates a tricky balancing act. There is a fine line that you must walk between seeing the correlation between symptoms and thoughts as an avenue for hope and seeing it as a reason for self-blame. It is not so easy to say, “oh just think differently and your disease will go away”. It is not that simple. There are layers upon layers. It is beneath conscious awareness.

The horse within me perks her ears and opens an eye. She lets out a soft sigh. I am finally seeing her.

I am finally listening.

She is not getting up yet, but there is hope.

Lilian is an observer and a trouble-shooter. She has observed the patterns clearly. She has made the correlations. She has noticed that chronic illnesses are grouping of stress response symptoms, Parkinson’s disease being a particularly obvious one. The growing understanding in the world is that 90% of disease is stress related.

Lilian does not base her approach on foregone assumptions about the mechanics of Parkinson’s Disease. The rest of the PD treatment world relies on the assumption that PD is caused by a lack of dopamine and focuses on that. Lilian has looked beyond that. She looks at each person individually and looks at each symptom as an overactive symptom of stress. She has developed a multi-step program to begin to alleviate the symptoms of chronic disease. The beginning point is the recognition that there is hope.

Her method of healing involves several steps.

  1. Adopting a new belief system that the physical disease symptoms are linked to thoughts, beliefs and emotions. (HOPE)
  2. Catching stressful reactions (Observe symptoms)
  3. Other healing modalities that reduce stress.
    E.g. exercise and getting to the root cause of subconscious or habitual stressful triggers and solving them (Pacify stress)
  4. Adding power to your own journey  (Engage)

 

In my first session with Lilian over a year ago, she explained step 1. In that year (this is not a standard length of time between visits, it is normally one to two weeks), I have seen so clearly and experienced the correlation between thoughts, emotions and beliefs so acutely in my body. And so here I am and I begin again. Ready to look deeper, to see if I can address what is keeping my body in a perpetual danger response.

The horse within me perks her ears and opens an eye. She lets out a soft sigh. I am finally seeing her. I am finally listening. She is not getting up yet, but there is hope.

Change your beliefs

You need to have  supporting beliefs on your journey toward smaller symptoms:

Of course you can get better

Mind and body are connected and interact

If just one person in the world can get better, so can I

Here I am ready to look deeper, to see if I can address what is keeping my body in a perpetual danger response.

.

Nicole St. Arnaud
11. march 2021, Alberta Canada

This is the second of a series of blog posts on the progress in Lilian Sjoeberg’s Hope Shortcut program for chronic illness.

You can learn more about her program here

May Evers – Dancing

See this story if you want a better health

May Evers

“I was diagnosed in 2014.

Since then, I’ve been trying to come to terms with Parkinson’s. It annoys me that Parkinson’s and its symptoms are little known in the public and I am trying to change that.

I use a lot of time to find out how I can reduce my symptoms.”

Dance and reduce your symptoms
May found out that dancing 2x 30 minutes reduced symptoms.
She got diskinesia due to overmedication and have stepped down 30% in medication

Who is May

May here introduces herself and her way to smaller symptoms

  • She could feel she needed to move and start dancing 2×30 minutes a day.
  • Because of dancing she got diskinesia due to overmedication and reduced her medications by  30%
  • She has felt that needlework also calms her down. The monotonous work that needs your full attention is mindful.
  • Hiking is also the body’s natural way to a calm mind and body

Stiching helps as well

The many faces of Parkinson’s

A picture of hope May wants to make 185 embroidered portraits of people with Parkinson’s disease, put together, make a big face of hope. People are united by the hope of healing. What keeps them strong is the community.

“Take part in this adventure!

I am still missing a few photos of people with Parkinson’s so that I can reach my goal. I would be very happy if you would support me. Send a photo of you to dererstefisch@web.de, I will delete it immediately after processing.

Here you can see how many portraits I have finished, how many are currently in progress and how many I am still missing.”

Dance down in symptoms

May dance morning and after work.

Doing this natural movements help you to get out of your instincts.
If you are 100% calm you do not have symptoms.
Here you can see a video she has made about her dancing – an example.

The right belief

May try new therapies and excersises and listen carefully to her body to see what she can do to become more calm. This ability is called interoception and is an important sense of ours.

She understand that it take time every day to reduce stress.

Her job takes time from the most important thing to get better. But she is doing her best.
Now she use nearly 2 hours per day and 4-5 hours hiking in the weekent

Why not search for anything that helps and try it​

Tiphanie Gould-Gillespie

Draw – paint – art. The way to better health. It is possible to become better and reduce your symtoms from most diseases that are stress related as Parkinsons

Artwork as way out of stress and symptoms

Tiphanie Gould-Gillespie is one good example of how Parkinson’s is NOT a devastating disease. She used her diagnosis as a transformation to a better life.

Not only are her symptoms reduced to 20%, but she also chose to come off her prescribed medication, and she instinctively knew that she had to change her lifestyle completely.
She drew a line in the sand on her old life entirely. She challenged her own imperfections and learned to live with them through her artwork.
She had never painted before, but during the last year has seen Tiphanie has seen her art develop to a place where she can start to exhibit her works for other people to admire.
What could your challenge be?
She found that painting was a way of reducing her stress and leading to a more mindful life, whilst her Parkinson’s symptoms reduced considerably.

Hobbywork - Painting
- a way to a symptom free life

My past - stress

My world was perfect. I had a fascinating but full-stress job.
I was a high performing speech therapist
I start to have Parkinson’s when I was in the middle of all this, but I covered up my symptoms.
When my Parkinson’s got worse, I have to step out of my job. I had so many significant side effects that I chose to step out of medication, which was very hard.
I now consume zero medication.

"I have made a challenge to see what happes if I painted full time for one year."

tiphanie gillespie
On pause due to Parkinsons

Reeinventing myself

I need to do something to reinvent myself.

I instinctively knew that I must do something radical.

I transformed from being an extroverted business girl to an introverted artist.

I have never painted before as I have many talented artists in my family. I saw the painting when they struggled in life.
Little did I know that making art gives you a break from stress.

Being 100% dedicated to my art has given me confidence as an artist selling my art.

Being a hermit in my house for the last year has been fantastic for my mind and learning new skills.

I only make 2 social arrangements per week.

No one understands this, but my symptoms have been reduced the big time by this calmer lifestyle.
What a difference a year makes

Thiphanie have started to sell her art on posters and t-shirts

When I could not wear high heels, I could paint high heels

I looked at my old wardrobe with lots of buttons and gorgeous-looking decorations that made the clothes difficult when getting dressed.
I left the fashion style and now wear practical clothes, no makeup, and a simple hairstyle. I needed to let go of so many of my previous habits for dressing. I let go of old standards for how I needed to look. I feel a lot calmer, not needing to be the perfect version anymore.

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There is beauty in the broken.

I integrate the tremors in my art. When I have tremors and use the waves as an extra element.

Mental Health and the connection to Parkinsons

Mental Health must be truly understood for what it is.
Mental Health is literally at the core of all things mental, physical, spiritual, and political. Mental health is the core factor of every single choice as we move through the world. Every single interaction is shadowed by the state of our mental health.

Why not integrate your tremor into your hobby, and bend your definition of perfectionism

Kimi Sand

Hypnosis is an effective tool for changing old patterns of action and creating new, more appropriate habits. It works better than regular talk therapy because the hypnotist speaks to the client’s unconscious. He goes a layer deeper into automatic learning.
One can work with performance anxiety concerning jobs or sexual performance.

Kimi Sand

The first to be trained in the HOPEshortcut methods for systematic symptom reduction

You will find her in the hope shortcut online course where she gives a demonstration on what relaxation sound files can do to relax you.

Today, many people are nervous about trying hypnosis because they are afraid that something may happen that they are not in control of, that the hypnotherapist can make them do something they do not want to do. But it is a misunderstanding.

Ask her anything. She is not shy.

During the hypnosis, the client is just relaxed but can hear everything going on and can interrupt the session in case of anything unpleasant.

relationship and HOPE therapist
Everyone has the right to live a life with lots of quality in it!

You do not have to go through it alone.

If the relationship misses sparkle and glow, do not give up.

 

By building a bridge with good tools for communication and lots of fun and exciting exercises, you can breathe life into a relationship where the embers are about to go out. You may have had many years together, and there is a lot to build on, do not throw it away, but get help to breathe fire into the embers again.

Most relationships have periods where the desire for each other can be more or less gone. Still, by becoming aware of all the good reasons you have for working on the relationship, you can experience that your relationship becomes more robust than ever before. Then it will be easier to live with the fact that there must also be room for everyday life, where you may remember to enjoy all the little things you do for each other.

 

But communication can be difficult, especially if you have built trenches and go and pick on each other. Then it can be almost impossible to spot love, but I can help with that.

With the help of various tools, you can find your way back to mutual love or find a dignified way to separate if that is what you agree. It is not always best to stay together at any cost, even if you have children together

Do something about what you are unhappy with, take control

  • Family and relationship therapist 2017
  • Hypnotist and hypnotherapy 2017
  • A vaginal therapist from the School of Sexology 2016
  • The elastic pelvic floor 2015
  • Sexologist 2014
  • Child treatment KST 2002
  • Special training in the pelvic floor 2000
  • Reflexology 1989

Interview with
Kimi Sand

Any change of people with chronic diseases start with giving new HOPE

  • Nearly all unpleasant symptoms have related to stress. So that is why hypnotherapy works
  • By reducing any old trauma, you will feel safer and will slowly reduce the related symptoms

You can also become better by opening up to mind and body connected more than we believe today.

Testemonials

“Opening up a new journey for my personal growth, and increasing my self confidence ”

In just a few sessions we've found out that the chronic neck pain was mostly about substituting past negative thoughts and beliefs with new ones, more positive and (to be honest) more close to the truth. The tightness is now half of what it was before, and is progressively bothering me less and less.
I've come to work with Kimi worried about the physical symptoms from a past traumatic event. We've worked with a combination of self hypnosis and closed eye journeying, to dig deeper into the causes.
A lot for me was about safety, and working with Kimi has increased it significantly, opening up a new journey for my personal growth, and increasing my self confidence and belief I've all it takes to go through new life challenges.
Livio

Testemonials

“Kimi creates a good and safe atmosphere”

Talking to Kimi is a beneficial experience. Kimi creates a good and safe atmosphere and uses different treatments. I have greatly enjoyed the combination of conversation, and healing. I especially appreciate the direct and honest way she is and the advice I received. Thanks for the help.
Karen

“ I needed a little push to get in the right direction - and I got it”

I sought out Kimi specifically because I had major challenges with pain in connection with intercourse. Kimi assured me that we could quickly get my problem solved and that I was not the only one with that kind of challenge. That gave me peace of mind. In my first conversation with Kimi, she gave me many tools/homework and a different approach than I had. Namely, that I should love towards myself, fill my cup and remember that I am the most critical person in my own life. Seeking out Kimi at this point was just right for me because I was ready to take on the tasks, perform them - and it has made a world of difference. I feel like I have rediscovered myself in my own company - and I thrive here!
Anne







Why not take a shortcut to better health and relationships via hypnosis

Nicoles reflections after 1. therapy session

Nicole’s thoughts after the 1st therapy session. How do Parkinson’s symptoms fit in with therapy? Listen to her thoughts

What I Wish Everyone Knew About Stress

The author behind the blog www.aslowerkindoflife.com shares her thoughts about life with Parkinson’s disease and about the
HOPE shortcut
The method where people with chronic diseases such as Parkinson’s can reduce their stress-related symptoms and, with persistent work, break free of their diagnosis

One week after first session with the Hope Shortcut therapy

“Life is bliss, but my brain is trying to convince me otherwise.”

I thought I knew it all about the impact of stress on the body and mind. I’ve studied this topic many times over the many years I’ve been searching for healing. I thought I had it dialed. I know that stress has real physical impacts on the body, that the stress response called Fight Flight or Freeze, can be triggered by the most subtle thoughts, and that society is totally hooked on stress. I know how to counteract stress through relaxation techniques. I know how to create new patterns in the brain.

This is what I wish everyone knew about stress

  1. Your thoughts, beliefs, and perceptions can be a source of stress.
  2. Stress has a real physiological impact on the body.
  3. Most of us are caught in a habitual state of chronic stress.
  4. Chronic stress can create disease states in the body and mind.
  5. A subconscious trigger can initiate the stress response.
  6. Counterbalancing the stress response in the body is essential to good health.
  7. What we do to “relax” may not actually be relaxing.
  8. Techniques like progressive relaxation, meditation, heart coherence, qigong, yoga, tai chi can create the relaxation response in the body and counteract the effects of stress.
  9. Exercise is beneficial because it burns up the excess cortisol and adrenaline in the body created by stress.

I know that my sensitive little nervous system seems to be highly attuned and highly responsive to even the smallest stressful triggers. I am aware of the common sources of unnecessary stress, and I have designed my life not to waste my precious energy on unnecessary stress triggers. I don’t watch the news. I don’t get involved in drama or gossip. I don’t have a packed schedule. I try not to worry about appearances or what other people might think of me. I no longer have a stressful career. I have a peaceful life, so I thought. I also thought I had already done the work to uncover unconscious stress responses. I thought I had mastered my internal critical dialogue. I had healed that aspect of myself that thought I had to do something extraordinary to earn love and acceptance.

I was wrong…

I recently met a Danish biologist named Lilian Sjoberg, who is helping people with Parkinson’s disease and other chronic illnesses reduce their symptoms by becoming aware of their stressful patterns and addressing the root cause. She has recognized that symptoms of Parkinson’s disease look a lot like an extreme Fight Flight or Freeze response.  I find this hypothesis quite accurate, and I started to recognize it in my own body.

Last summer, I was standing in knee-depth wading pool with my friend and our two-year-old sons.  We were looking up at a bird flying by, and I suddenly heard a splash. Her son had slipped and gone under the water. In a quick moment of mommy instinct, she grabbed him and yanked him back up. He came up sputtering, but he was ok. I held my son more tightly. Moments later, my Parkinson’s symptoms hit me with full force. Tremor, muscles freezing, movement slow, brain foggy. I realized that it felt like a full-body panic attack. After this incident, I became more aware of my symptoms related to fearful thoughts. Sometimes I would note an extremely subtle trigger in my thoughts, and sometimes I couldn’t tell what had made a sudden worsening of my symptoms.

I had offered to help Lilian to reach a wider audience with her important message. She asked me to go through her coaching process and write about it. I still thought I already knew what she had to offer from my previous studies on stress. I was wrong. On the healing journey, there is always more to discover.

The first thing Lilian asked me to do was to record my thoughts, emotions, and physical responses throughout a day. I was surprised how stressed out I still am.

Although I am retired from a stressful career, I am now recreating that stress and pressure in my home life. It’s because my brain got so used to stress and pressure that it is literally stuck. The hard-wired pathway in my brain for stress, pressure, and worry is like a superhighway. The one for peace and ease is like a rabbit trail through a dense forest. I am slowly making it more discernible through inconsistent practice.

Lilian’s exercise allowed me to see the direct physical effects on my body as the stress accumulated in the day.

Observe your symptoms

In the process of learning the HOPE shortcut you learn how to keep a diary that helps you to connect symptoms and stress in your life.

Initially the reason is to give you a new belief about the disease

Later it becomes an important tool to reduce your symptoms one by one

This is an excerpt of what I recorded in only one morning (B is my 3 year old son):

9:00 am: B. asks to watch a show.

My thoughts: “But shows are bad for his brain. I shouldn’t let him watch shows. I should engage him in enriching activities. What a failure I am as a mother…”

My body: My stomach tightens.

10:15 am: B. slouched in the car seat and staring out the window blankly.

“OMG. Is there something wrong with him? Does he have the coronavirus? Is he going to die? I feel so helpless. Should I drive straight to the hospital?”

My body: My left hamstring cramps and spasms. My stomach is in knots.

10:20 am: B. says he is hungry

“I forgot the snack in the fridge. OMG. Why can’t I get it together? How do other moms seem to be able to do this, and I can’t. I need help.”

My body: My jaw and facial muscles on the left side tighten.

10:30 am, I do not have B.’s indoor shoes for the babysitting room.

“I forgot B.’s indoor shoes. Oh no. Maybe the babysitter won’t notice. They have to let him in. What if they don’t let him in? Why can’t I get it together?’”

My body: My leg is fully dragging now. My tremor has begun. I am having trouble focusing.

I obviously have a body that is extremely sensitive and at its maximum capacity for handling stress already. Would these symptoms still have come on without my constant barrage of worrisome and self-critical thoughts? I don’t know. I did notice that my thoughts have me in a constant state of self-criticism and stress.

In my first coaching session with Lilian, she recognized that the habitual worrisome thoughts and pressure that I put on myself is a subconscious habit that I picked up in childhood. We work through using different techniques.

Since my session with Lilian on Monday morning, I am feeling a new sense of peace

I had a better day with B. today, putting less pressure on myself and becoming more aware of my stressful thoughts before they get out of hand. I am feeling more confident that I can take a little bit of power back from my roller coaster of unpredictable symptoms by recognizing my internal stressors and using relaxation techniques when they arise.

The research is now very strong that certain specific techniques that counteract the stress response and change the internal state of the body can result in significant health improvements.

I wish everyone understood the impacts of stress on the body: that thoughts can create stress, that the brain becomes habituated to stress and will seek out more, and that there are things you can do about it.

Nicole St. Arnaud
2. march 2020, Alberta Canada

Follow HOPEshortcut here

Quilting as a hobby

Diane Crowel and her hobby that helps her calm down her anxiety

Who is Dianne Crowel

Hi all

My name is Dianne Crowel (to the right).
I have had Parkinson´s disease for 5 years.

My symptoms are not too bad, so I can do a lot of the things I am used to.
I use Quilting as a relaxing and comforting hobby when my disease gives me anxiety.

Quilting
- a way to a calm life

Purpose

If you are Hopeless, the best thing is to get a purpose that reaches beyond yourself.

I quilt animals for people that have lost loved ones. I call them memory bears.

This job keeps me busy and makes the people so very happy to have something to hug. 

When I see how I can impact other peoples´ lives It gives me a good feeling as well.

Mindfull

Having a hobby means that you can always comfort yourself and relieve stress.

Your hobby must be so easy that you quickly develop a routine doing it, so you are slowed down in speed. And it is prefferable that it is a bit challenging so your thoughts do not wander anywhere else, to the past or future.
When you get to this sweet spot, it is as good as meditation. It is a form of mindfulness.

When your thoughts stay in the present moment, you will have fewer symptoms.

"I use my hobby to keep down my stress
and anxiety level"

Diane Crowel
Retired with Parkinsons

My work - Quilting

In the video I tell you a very short story about my work, my hug dogs and my quilts.

Feel free to contact me about my memory bears and hug dogs. It feels good to help other people in pain.

Just click on the video to the right and see 2 minutes of introduction to my Quilting world.

I have had Parkinson’s for about five years.

I am very convinced that the disease is stress-related:
I have had two bad marriages. My spouse was drinking and fighting me. It was terrible.

I have six kids, four boys two girls. The third boy has a cleft palate and has had several surgeries. Two have had terrible asthma.

Five of them made it and are all teachers. But one passed away two years ago. I have been having a hard time, but it is getting better.

Also, my symptoms get a little better as the anxiety reduces.

Socialize

I love working with my groups and doing what I can for them. Both online groups and local groups.
I do online cycling and yoga with Jacob. I want to do dance as well.

Sometimes a hobby comes with a social life, where you get the benefits from the joy other people can give you. We are social beings and we therefore thrive in supportive surroundings.

 

Be in the moment

My grandchildren are happy to help me with the quilts and you can see how they like to show the blankets to us.

Being around my grandchildren makes all fear fade away.

Why not slow down in speed

"When I am on vacation I have a lot less symptoms
I’m away from stressful things. Love to go."

Diane Crowel
Retired with Parkinsons

Quilting Questions